Journal #163: People mistake pleasure for happiness.
They think that doing those things brings them enjoyment and fun, but they cannot handle sitting at home all day.
If living without it leaves them bored, lethargic, or constantly longing for and seeking it out, then it is nothing more than pleasure.
If even in the complete absence of all those things, one is not bored, does not long for them, and does not seek them out, only then am I willing to admit it isn't mere pleasure.
I overslept again today. Sigh.. I slept early and well yesterday, so what went wrong?
I felt peaceful without any bad mood or anything, but still, I want to keep my routine.
Sunday is no different from usual; I volunteer at the cafe and attend the service.
The pastor's sermon is getting better than before, but it seems he hasn't fully broken out of the framework yet.
Not that I am evaluating him or anything, but the pastor definitely knows.
He knows where the Father is located. Not many people actually know that.
If the pastor broadens his perspective further, perhaps he could move even further forward.
I want to know higher things. Perhaps those are things that cannot be learned in church or in theology departments.
That is only natural. They won't be in books either. Those can only be known through experience, through prayer.
Anyway.. I'm not sure if it's because of the pain coming from my neck, or if it's just a migraine coming on for the first time in a while.
I'm also feeling a bit tired.
- Thanks, Father
A moment's dopamine. That is, what people call happiness coming from worldly things, is actually "pleasure."
I learned that while reading a book. I didn't know how to express that dopamine.. but the book explained it to me. It was "pleasure."
People mistake pleasure for happiness.
Something that stays for a brief moment and leaves. In a way, it is like a "refuge" for them in a difficult world.
They think that doing those things brings them enjoyment and fun, but they cannot handle sitting at home all day.
If living without it leaves them bored, lethargic, or constantly longing for and seeking it out, then it is nothing more than pleasure.
If even in the complete absence of all those things, one is not bored, does not long for them, and does not seek them out, only then am I willing to admit it isn't mere pleasure.
Even so, I often felt that anyone walking this path would share the same thoughts and experiences.
I can see him struggling with pleasure and self-control.
In fact, I also find myself having those same struggles the moment I let go of myself.
Another thing I gained while reading the book was about prayer.
When we sing a song, we completely focus on the song. Prayer must be the same.
And today, though I don't know exactly for how long, I experienced ecstasy.
I can say it was truly a grace-filled experience.
I executed my routine well today. The earring sketches are also roughly all finished.
Now tomorrow, I just need to go to Jong-ro, pick up the products, check for myself how much shrinkage there is, and wrap things up.
Father, thank You. Thank You for giving me the answer through a book when I was contemplating prayer.
It rained heavily. So I couldn't go for a run.
Today was the day to go to Jongno to pick up the rubber molds and the products.
I put on slippers and headed to Jongno, picked up the products, and handed them over to my acquaintance at the studio.
Because I calculated the shrinkage rate well, the pins fit properly. I felt a sense of relief.
Now I just need to move quickly on the earrings. It doesn't seem like it will be difficult.
- Father, thank You. Thank You for creating a good result.
All the earring designs are finished.
I'm not sure if the Huggie earrings will turn out well, but I won't know unless I try.
Now I'm thinking about giving keyrings some thought.
I asked acquaintances to give me work. I requested to be put into staircase cleaning quickly.
I also asked for an opening in the reinforced earth (retaining wall) work that a friend I work with is doing, whenever a spot opens up.
Money is tight. Whenever I try to do something, I keep getting blocked by money.
As soon as I work a few times, I plan to run more ads and invest more in e99.
Prayer is still not going well.
Noticing/Awareness is, of course, going very well. But stray thoughts won't disappear and keep persisting.
Just as I focus on the present and focus on my breathing, stray thoughts creep right back in.
Of course, I catch it and return immediately, but then stray thoughts enter again right away.
What I want is for all ego to die, and to be completely filled with only the Father.
To notice/be aware means that there is a self that notices.
I am not any being/entity at all. Though, if expressed in language, this too would be called a self.
Father, thank You. Thank You for continuously training me to lay down my selves (egos).
Because it rained today, instead of going for a run, I went to the gym and then headed to the office.
I cast the earrings, and 2 are finished while 2 need a bit of adjustment.
It's nothing major, just adjusting the post position and refining details.
The earrings seem to have turned out better than expected. Casting should likely be done by next week.
The question is whether the Huggie Earrings will turn out well even after casting.. I'll just have to try and see.
My cervical herniated disc seems like it's getting better, yet it isn't.
Even during prayer, there is pain near my shoulder blade, so I can't concentrate properly.
Of course, there are still many stray thoughts remaining. I believe everything will return to normal soon.
- Father, thank You. Thank You for giving me the strength to pray, even though there is pain.
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Now I understand the Old Testament. Only now do I know how it ought to be read.
As my perspective shifts and I get to know the Father more, it becomes easier to read.
The important thing is that still, many people accept the text of the Old Testament literally, or fail to read it properly.
If we truly know and meet the Father, we must no longer be bound by guidebooks such as the Bible, the Tao Te Ching, the Quran, or the Vedas.
Those are merely frames, and they act like placing limits on our infinite spirit and the Father's power.
It cannot be denied that many figures such as Moses, David, Abraham, Joseph, and Jacob met the Father.
And depending on the historical context of that time, we cannot judge whether their actions were right or wrong.
I also realized that the Father did not love only the people of Israel during that era.
The Father lives within the hearts of people all over the world.
It is simply that the Bible itself was written in that region, and because it was written there, it was written to fit their lives.
Things like the Father killing or sweeping people away—those too were actions performed because the people living in that era received such inspiration.
Whether that was right or wrong is not for us to decide. We don't even know if our own lives right now are right or wrong.
The various rules and laws spoken by Moses were things he had to do because he had to lead and manage those people, as he was their leader.
And those were certainly things Moses obtained through dialogue with the Father. He simply believed in them and did it.
Ah.. explaining this in words is so difficult. I believe those who understand will be able to understand.
And the Ten Commandments exist within other guidebooks as well.
They are merely being taught through different languages and different cultures, using different words and expressions.
If you are truly awake, if you have truly come to know the Father, you will be able to understand my words.
This was an enlightenment that came to me during prayer this morning.
Today, I visited Seoul and Pyeongtaek to see my grandmother and father.
My grandmother has grown quite elderly, and she offered words of wisdom accordingly.
Although I lack familial affection and don't listen to others, her words were wise.
However, it was a concept I already knew, and since everything is the Father's work..
I did not give her a definitive answer regarding the things she asked of me as the eldest grandson.
It was the same with my father. I didn't give a definitive answer to anything regarding ancestral rites.
It's not because I'm a Christian. I just no longer make promises about far-off future things.
In other words, I don't place any constraints or frames on my life.
It's the same with cigarettes, alcohol, flour, fried foods, chocolates, and so on. I simply don't consume them.
If I must, or if I want to, I can do it at any time. I just choose not to.
Because even if you ask me right now, I genuinely don't want to do or eat them in the present moment.
At any rate, I've safely brought today's long, long journey to a close.
- Father, thank You. By continuously training me, I am able to experience even deeper oneness with You,
and I have realized that the things You command us to do are truly for our peace.
Thank You.
NecklaceFix related to the necklace pin
EarringSketchDesign
Upload Every Product to Q10Change info where they are on AmondzSuspend Payoneer
- 상표 등록 (In Progress)
- 2nd Season
- Necklace
- Take the pics
- Products
- Excaliber
- Crown
- Shield
- Bandage 2
- Wearing
- Products
- Make the posters
- Upload
- To Website
- To Amondz
- To Q10
- Take the pics
- Earring
- Finish Designing
- Fix something wrong
- Re-print
- Cast
- Key Chain
- Sketch
- Design
- Finish Designing
- Fix something wrong
- Necklace
- Reorganize the e99 website, like pics til it’s done for every product
- Retake the photos of the earring that is on it.
- Retake the pic of the Ramen necklace
- Buy all of the jewelry findings we need
- Make the expense tracker
- Go through the Q10
To renew a blog constantlyMake the same page for tags
Make an Insta template for fashion.
- Renew a blog constantly
- Make the Music Page
- Figure out how to get the information quickly about the news I handle
Finish reading the book I’ve been reading.Organize ID, PASSWORDSee Grandma and Father.
- Make the Bank Account (Next Month)
- Contact people who I wanna do
- Read half of the book I bought
- Figure out what LinkedIn is.
- Make the expense tracker
💸💸💸
Yearly
- eLEMENTOR pLUGIN ₩85,000
(oCTORBER) - cAFE24 hOSTING ₩60,000
(fEBRUARY) - SSL ₩40,000
(mARCH)
Total ₩-
Total ₩-
January ₩216,900
March ₩778,000
May ₩226,000
July ₩144,000
February ₩188,000
April ₩322,500
June ₩126,000

Journal #166: Where does greed and desire end, and where does Father's word begin..

Journal #165: Someday, the day will come when I stop writing in this diary.

Journal #164 : 더 이상 기도에 관해 고민은 하지 않으려고 한다.

Journal #163: People mistake pleasure for happiness.

