I’ve been thinking lately—
Maybe life is just about coming to your own conclusions, failing, embracing the pain that follows,
and then fixing it.

We’re living in a world where the internet pushes so much useless info into our heads.
We’ve become addicted to “relatable” posts and videos.
But honestly? It’s a trap.
We’re forgetting how to think, judge,
and act for ourselves because we feel like we’ve already achieved something just by watching others do it.

Look around.
We’re surrounded by addictions: cigarettes, porn, propaganda, endless scrolling, dramas, junk food, alcohol…
We tell ourselves these things make us happy.
We finish a long day, grab a beer with some snacks, turn on a video, and say,
“Now this is happiness.”

But maybe I shouldn’t have started thinking so much.
Albert Camus said in The Myth of Sisyphus that beginning to think is the beginning of being “undermined.”
We were happier when we knew nothing—before we bit the “apple” of society.
Now, we’re injected with things we never needed to know.
To me, true happiness is when you don’t even think about the word “happiness.”
Life is simply about enduring the pain.

The world isn’t defined by what people say on SNS.
We’re over 8 billion people, each living a unique life.
Yet, we let a tiny minority define what “women are like” or “men are like.”
We close ourselves off to the possibility that the person standing right in front of us might be different.
We’ve lost the art of thinking alone, acting alone, falling, and getting back up.

Society and school gave us structure, but they also trapped us.
I only realized this at 18, and it took me until 29 to figure out what I actually wanted to do.
I’m honestly jealous of kids these days.
Until I graduated high school, I had no idea what I liked, what my talents were, or even who I was.
I just lived as I was told, without any self-awareness.

It’s the same with philosophy.
I used to love it, but now it feels empty.
If you love books and philosophy, please—don’t just blindly agree with me.
My thoughts are mine, meant for my life.
You need to ask your own questions, find your own answers, fail your own failures,
and find your own way to stand back up.
Listen to advice, sure, but remember that the final call is always yours.

For me, I know God and Jesus.
I start every morning with prayer—repenting, giving thanks, and just trying to feel Their presence.
I don’t “study” the Bible like a textbook anymore.
I just read it for 30 minutes every night with the heart of a child.
I don’t force the questions; I let God provide them, and the answers too.

I know, I’m contradicting myself.
A minute ago, I said you should be the master of your own thoughts,
and now I’m saying I give everything to God.
But that’s why I try to live in the present.
My thoughts a minute from now will probably birth another contradiction.

I’m giving everything—even myself—to Him.
But the conclusion remains the same: don’t get swept away.
Keep your balance. Cut off what needs to be cut off.
In the end, you only know by doing.

There’s no “right answer.” No failure, no success. Only realization.
You can only see the path by walking it.
Maybe that’s why they say the hardships God sends are a blessing—
because they’re the only things that keep us moving forward.